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Maybe you're bald, maybe not, maybe you care, likely not; stories here, some funny, some not.

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Stories used for publication of Baldie Stories 1 have been removed from this blog.

Friday, March 12, 2010

spam reply

     My name is Rolando Le Roar, your personal vacation planner. I am writing this email in response to your recent on-line inquiry regarding our cruise packages here at Circus Cruise Lines. Please contact me directly with any questions you may have regarding our package plans. If you are not interested in our packages, please send an email in response, to the above address or write directly to....

     Dear Rolando,
     Funny, that's about the hundredth e-mail I've received from you.
     To tell you the truth, I don't recall making any inquiry into Circus Cruise Lines, however, now that you mention it, I do have a question; do have any theme cruises for balding men?
     Do you?
     Do you have cruise packages for balding men and their families?
     I'd pay to see that.
     If you don't I can suggest a few theme opportunities, a couple of real laughers, cause there's nothing funnier than a room full of half-balding men, drunk off their keesters, wondering when their wives will finally get tired of all that sheen and squinting, not to mention the whining and complaining, and that brings us to the follies - a couple of barrels of tar and feathers, a few young guys with rock-star hair to get the ladies sharpened up - and the kids, some schnauzers, duct-tape, I'm not suggesting...
     I have ideas! We should get together, you and I - where you based? I can come and visit, I got time, a little time, between parole meetings, I'd love to stop by and discuss the whole thing - how's your hair by the way? I got some good stuff my dear old dad sold me before he went missing.
     I really don't remember sending any inquiries; I may try to Google you, maybe look you up, track you down, I'm a late night kind of guy, spend a lot of hours blinking in the mirror, listening to my wife snore - Yeah, I think I'll look you up, just to touch back on all the kind emails you've been sending me lately!
see you soon,
your friend,
Creepy Keester

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