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Maybe you're bald, maybe not, maybe you care, likely not; stories here, some funny, some not.

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Tuesday, November 10, 2009


     Dear God,
     Is there a lot of hair in heaven? I mean, as a comparison for example, would you say there is more rough poundage in angel wings or hair up there? Does everyone have long flowing hair? Do you have a choice in heaven? Do you have to wash and condition it? If it's really long does it get sucked down the drain like it does down here... not that I'd know how that works these days.
     If you die and go to heaven do you get to have the hair you used to have, the hair that you want to have, or are you stuck with what you drop dead with for all eternity? That's what I'm talking about when I ask about choices. It's very confusing.
     If I did bad things here on earth, let's say not bad enough for hell but bad enough to put me at the end of the line at the pearly gates, what then? Smaller wings and smaller hair? Can I trade in my wings for more hair? Without wings will I plummet out of heaven, scream past earth, and crash-land in hell?
     Do you know if they have hair in hell? I guess I should ask, cause when push comes to shove I'm not really sure I make the cut, even for the end of the line. I'd imagine there is hair in hell; hot, burning hair. It' still hair though - on fire, not on fire - hair is hair, I'm not picky.
     Does the devil have hair? Does he gloat over it? Is that why bad guys in the movies always have long flowing hair, sometimes tied back into a ponytail or draped over their shoulders?
     I find it hard to picture myself with hair again. Which reminds me; Is it bad to be cremated? Will I need this head to hang my heavenly hair on? I wouldn't think so, since you're coming up with the hair out of thin air I'll guess you're coming up with the head out of thin air as well. This notion, if you walk it down the street, would take us to another important issue; when you're coming up with that new-found hair and the new head to put it on, can you do something about the body too? With a new head of hair I'd probably need something better in the body department, better than what I have now, say maybe,the body of a world class swimmer or possibly a soccer player?
     Just trying to get my ducks in a line, in a row, stacked neatly, you know, for the future.
     Well, I'm just asking, praying, you know what I mean, for some hair...

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